I fastened my soul to you a long time ago
And I can’t quite seem to undo the latch
Though you toss and kick
I still sit tight
Waiting for the time to be right.
Your rolling nerves just under my skin
Tell me there’s nothing left within
Not for me not for what we were
Of that you’re really making sure.
So jump and shake. Bruise and buck
One of these days I’ll stop giving a f#%*$
She’s a slut you know
She makes them cum she lets them go.
She wears her tank tops way too tight
She wears short skirts.
It’s just not right.
She leads them on
They can’t help but fall
Into her wicked snare
You can’t blame them.
She’s a manipulative whore
A line of suitors out the door.
Her soft skin, drives them insane
A pity she doesn’t have a brain.
She should cover up. Hide her skin
Then maybe our men wouldn’t sin.
Let’s blame her. Let’s call her a easy
Because it could never be that our men are sleazy.
She’s so beautiful and so pretty
It just makes us feel extra shitty
We’d rather judge her wanton ways
How else would we spend our boring days?
My sad eye is pressed up against the wall
I heard the nightingale’s silent call
Out there everything shimmers
You in the middle of a lake that glimmers
Flora and fauna and mossy roads
Faeries and pixies and croaking toads.
Water spouting out your finger
A thousand reasons to let me linger
Staring out at your bright world
Ignoring the fact that I’m being absurd.
Is it better to have a crack
Or does it just highlight what I lack?
I just wanted to take his little hand and run.
Jump on a bus and go on an adventure.
He didn’t want to go to school and little sobs racked his big soul.
His quivering lips , his wet eyes.
I wasn’t ready for such goodbyes.
All I could think was that:
His whole life would be filled with timetables.
He wouldn’t be able to run away.
So why not today son?Why the hell not.
Let’s run while we still can.
While it’s still fun
Because someday you won’t have your mum.
Someday you’ll be in a suit and tie
With no one at the gate to wave goodbye
And when I die you can reveal my name
And they’ll say: “I didn’t realise she was so sad.”
But aren’t we all?
(Some more than most)
Your persistence paid off…
I love you.
Yep that’s it. I do.
You are human after all.
And that is my only requirement.
A semi-decent human and I’ll be yours forever.
That’s why I don’t allow myself to go so easy.
There isn’t enough of me to divide out with you all.
That’s why it took so long.
But once you chip away the shell
I’m all soft inside.
I’m like slime in those kids toys.
Throw me around and I’ll stick to the wall
I’ll stick to you all.
So be careful.
Once I’m covered in fluff
You’ll have enough
There’s torment in the pit of me
And this tight ball of fear won’t disappear
I sit, consumed with worry
I can’t quite get a grip
These thoughts that dangle from my brain
Are covered in spiders.
Yesterday I bounced on land
Now I sink into quicksand
Is anyone else the same?
Or am I all alone in this video game?
The doctor dismissed me by being gruff
Doesn’t he know I’ve had enough?
Nothing again will fill me with cheer.
I have nothing to worry about
But everything to fear
I’m in a self-induced coma
I can’t cope with this life
So I’ll shut it out for now
Stop paying attention
Turn off the TV
Smother the radio
Try to find joy inside
Hope that my childish notion of happy endings
Can still come true.
” Stop the world I want to get off?”
Nah… just stop the noise.
Just do the washing-up already
Pick the clothes up from the floor
Write that book you’ve been talking about
Paint that peeling door.
Just go for a relaxing walk
Sit and read a book
Cook that cake you wanted to
Give that film a look.
This is what my brain says
Day after day after day
But my soul just wants to sit here
And the world to go away.
Once you recognise this then you know what needs to change. The blame game can only take you so far but ownership of your flaws or problems can propel you forwards into the life you want.
She sat too close.Burped then sneezed. I could smell supper on her breath as her leg grazed mine. She sniffled and her stomach growled while the music through her earphones.. battered the just blissful silence. Relentless closeness. If I moved away it would be obvious. I felt boxed in by her human noises. I work so hard on subduing mine.
I felt angry at her lack of care, lack of aware.
How dare she ? Impinge on my space? Get in my face?
I was used to sanitized life. Minty breath… an acceptable distance between us all.
I wanted to growl at her. I wanted to push her away. I needed to say…
I turned and was about to glare at her latest emission
But was met with a surprise.
A smile that reached her eyes.
I could forgive her then.
For now I was seeing
She was behaving like
A human being.