Smart phone

Only smart if you are….I’m not.

I proved that.

I descended into the proverbial rabbit hole

I just couldn’t stop myself. The heat it generated in my skull should keep the battery going for years.

Hours of searching for something I was never even sure existed

By trying to prove to myself I wasn’t crazy … I became just that.

Lock me out. Of it. Of life. Of me.

Off

(C)Slumpless

Lie down

You fought until the bitter end

I’ll give you that at least

All the proof in front of me

You thought it was behind you.

You were like a cornered bird.

But at least they can fly.

You had nowhere to go

You turned into a festering mass

And I wondered how I ever saw anything else

Where were your soft, gentle hands ?

Where was your kind heart?

One lie down.

How many more ?

(C) Slumpless

Catching Stars

I can’t hope to catch the stars

Their jagged edges would cut through my net

And then what ?

To have but for a moment

Shimmering shine.

All mine.

But then for it to go?

How could my feet touch soil

My hands and body toil

Day after mutinous day

When my light had gone away?

I won’t lie in the gutter and look at the stars

I will hold the moon

Swing like a baboon.

I will not search for heaven on earth

Magic ends at birth

I will strap myself to comet

Whirl and soar and bathe in whispy galaxy

I will be part of the dream

Rather than the sleep

I will become the starlight

While you below shall weep.

(C) Slumpless

The Cull de Sac

I’m in a culling mood today

The type where no bullshit is allowed

If you want to be part of my life

Try fucking harder.

If you want respect….

Actually, I thought this was all pretty obvious

Oh well. Time tells.

She told on you and you and you too.

She told on my Mother and Father.

They should have tried bloody harder.

Today I have no patience for a shoulder shrug

I need people who willingly hug.

The kind who wrap me in fuzzy love

The ones who seem to be sent from above.

So today my whip is going to crack

Be a decent person or get the sack.

(C) Slumpless

This is for my best friend who puts her money where her mouth is and shows kindness instead of smugness. You know who you are xxx

Medusa

I must have met Medusa

For a brief moment.

Enough to turn my heart to stone.

Those snakes in her hair

Each of them with their own wicked agenda

Each the root of the cause

A heart that never thaws.

(C) Slumpless

Bigger Lakes

I took you to the lakes

“Is this it?” You said.

I took you to the hills but you wanted mountains.

To the woods but you wanted jungle.

I gave you my heart. But you took my soul.

My hand, but you grabbed my neck.

My devotion was met with no emotion.

My love hit a brick wall.

I’m learning to avoid the fall.

There are oceans out there for you to paddle

There are forests with trees for you to climb

Why the fuck did you even pick mine?

I hope you find what you seek

But please, please, please!

Don’t prey on the weak.

(C)Slumpless

Care Less

I didn’t realise it but I was waiting.

Waiting for you to shed that brittle skin

To show me someone better

To prove my doubting wrong.

I tried to shrug away your strange behaviour

Those angry outbursts make me cringe.

I tried to justify your lies

Your sideways glances at other women ?

I held back my whinge.

I kept waiting.

Over and over I gave into you.

Then suddenly oh suddenly I became aware

Of that wonderful feeling of “I don’t care”

PS: The funny thing of being able to post this

Is I know you never check my blog

Because on top of being a moron

You are also a self-centered hog 🐗

(C) Slumpless

Gas Light

You met your match, you lit the light

And you didn’t think I shone so bright

So you played me like a cat plays with a mouse

You spat at my house

You thought I had no idea

Your old methods worked before

But I’m not humble brother

I’m not stupid mother

Naive whore.

You knocked on the wrong door.

My brain forms connections while yours lies dormant

I know a serpent when I get bitten once

But I’m the charmer

Not you.

If you need to stick your dick

In other doors ,

Then do it silly

But your balls will get chilly

I’m not the jealous kind

I think you want me to mind.

I think your lies are how you try to control me.

Make me think I’m crazy.

Crazy girl. Crazy girl.

Lucky for me, I know I’m Loco.

But not for you and never because.

Oh there now. Don’t cry those crocodile tears my dear.

It’s ok to be caught out by someone like me.

I’m clever you see ? Not the fool you hoped I’d be.

So do stop your lying

It’s ever so trying.

Kinda boring if I’m honest

You’re turning me off.

Soon there will be no electricity

Just gas light.

(C)Slumpless

Kingdom

There’s a world down there,unaware.

They build kingdoms and homes

They have lives , they thrive.

They kill ,they eat, they screw

They just do.

Instead of looking up for answers we should look down

The benevolent girl who saves the spider

The scared adult who squashes it with his foot

Sometimes there’s reasoning to what we do.

Sometimes.

All the different layers

To whom should they send their prayers ?

Does the ant even notice me when I walk in his dominion?

Or is the anteater the only thing it sees ?

Too small to understand my ways.

Too different to begin to comprehend.

So when I try to decipher the reasons why

I will no longer look up to the sky

The meaning of life the all knowing and seeing

Is animal, plant and human being.

So I suppose even if it’s raining

I’ll try to make myself entertaining

Who knows somewhere for all I know

I’m appearing on a wildlife show.

(C)Slumpless

Knew Me

I had to be born again today.

Free myself of everything I thought I knew.

The net which I assumed would catch my fall

Was never there at all.

The arms that held me before I knew myself

Have turned to stone

I am well and truly alone.

As I hold my own flesh and blood

I am awake again.

I understand that there are no more excuses for their selfish maybes

I could never do this to my own baby.

Not now , not when he’s grown

I will never leave him on his own.

I guess I have to turn to other

When I can’t rely on my own…

I can’t even say it.

It hurts too much.

I am much too blue

The person I loved

I never knew.

(C) Slumpless

Rope Hope

Today I learned what it felt like to be alone.

More alone than someone with no one.

The solitude that stops your heart because every person in your life is not really there at all.

Is this a dream I wonder ?

Did I imagine bridges made of stone when in reality there were was only frayed rope?

No hope.

Hopeless.

13 reasons why ? I give you a million.

Made of shrugs, insincere hugs

Righteousness and pontification

SMUG. SMUG. SMUG.

And yet I suppose it’s better to wake up and see that I’m on the edge of a cliff.

And that I have been for a long time.

What’s keeping me here when the love I thought you all wanted has met nothing but ice.

Not nice. Not nice.

Oh well my dears.

I suppose you will tell yourselves you did your best.

Don’t blame yourself. She wasn’t right in the head.

She’s better off….

Don’t worry I won’t do anything “silly” though

Still it’s good to know

That when I needed my blood

You were all no fucking good.

(C) Slumpless

Atmosfear

I brought you stardust.

I went all the way up to the heavens

And gathered it in the palm of my hands.

I fought my way back into your murky atmosphere

Just to get a nod. A pat on the head.

But instead of warm air I got a vacuum

Cold and harsh

You suck the life from me.

How can there be lust

Without a sprinkle of stardust?

(C)Slumpless