Last Day

Lord grant me nothing as I did not believe
I only came to you when the rains came.
Lord fill me with nothing
Because that’s exactly what I did for you.
Am I so brazen to think that just because I ask you will listen ?
Give and I shall receive?
But I didn’t and don’t.
I wore this life out with not a thought for later
Not exactly a hater
But no great lover either.
The people I cared for , I did so with ease
Certainly not to please.
You.
The good deeds I did were for my own pleasure
Memories I treasure
For me.
Not you.
I did nothing too taxing or grand
Nothing that will change this land
This earth will take me back unchanged by my mark
Not brighter just stark.

So as I call out your name in writhing pain
And ask for release.
Don’t listen. Don’t give me peace.
I’m not a believer, I didn’t pray
It shouldn’t be different on my last day.

(C) Slumpless

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