And I’m mostly good ..mostly kind
But with you and because of you
I have dabbled in bold
Submerged my clean slate in mud
Oh but for those moments of bliss and shakes
Will I spend eternity with the snakes?
And if I believe in God will She forgive me?
Why should She though?
I knew it was wrong.
But She gave me these earthly wants
I mean She pushed us together didn’t She?
And who did we really harm?
Is that the point?
Better the devil you know
But she doesn’t know.
She doesn’t know.
You don’t know it but I still lug you around
Close to the ground
You weigh more than you should and I still don’t know why
And sometimes when I least expect it
You fall on the floor
All the remnants of what we were
Lie scattered about for all to see.
I’m getting better though
Better at packing you away.
At folding all those wrinkles out.
And someday(when I’m ready)
I will leave you behind in on a train
And you will be the one who is lost.
You tricked me into adoring you
You whispered songs in my ear and kissed my neck
I thought you were a gift
And in those moments I can see
That I rewrote my life for you
And even though I lost the plot
I worked you into my lines
Twisted you through the verses of my ways.
So now that you can walk past me in the street
Without a blink.Without a wink.
I wonder were our pages ever filled?
I called you an eraser before
But now I think you're highlighter.
Because you have shown me the errors of my ways
And though it has been ages and ages
I'm ready to remove you from my pages.
I broke the corners of my soul
And gave you those lonely edges
They tasted like me you said
Mostly good but tainted with need.
'Is that bad?' I said.
'It will be your undoing.'
You were right of course.
And as I unfurl the remainder of my curled up love
I see it is blackened by our plight.
And nobody mourned her death
Except for a single white rose that bobbed in the wind
And from the corner of my eye reminded me of her return in the morning
Soft and cautious on the gravel
Her miaow catching the wind
Her little soul my only companion on many a rainy day.
You are barely a quiver on my lip now
Just a sliver of a frown upon my face
The faintest dribble in the corner of my eye
Half a heart murmur on a summer day.
And in a while when all my cells renew
You won’t even be an atom in my soul.
Blue is our colour
Pools of sapphire that light up your face
And my day.
Your soft cerulean jumper.
That I long to touch but never do.
The azure oceans where one day we might swim
But probably never will.
The kind of movie our lovemaking would inspire
Set the world on fire
Put out with my indigo tears.
Yes it’s definitely our colour
And it’s certainly mine
That glacial feeling
When I have to leave
The colour of a dying heart on my sleeve.