Catching Stars

I can’t hope to catch the stars

Their jagged edges would cut through my net

And then what ?

To have but for a moment

Shimmering shine.

All mine.

But then for it to go?

How could my feet touch soil

My hands and body toil

Day after mutinous day

When my light had gone away?

I won’t lie in the gutter and look at the stars

I will hold the moon

Swing like a baboon.

I will not search for heaven on earth

Magic ends at birth

I will strap myself to comet

Whirl and soar and bathe in whispy galaxy

I will be part of the dream

Rather than the sleep

I will become the starlight

While you below shall weep.

(C) Slumpless

Fluffier Clouds

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You make me interesting.

I remember things I never used to.

Little slivers of pointless information

That you lap up.

All my quirks can be displayed

Delayed

Until the right moment

And I’m all new to you again.

There’s so much of me I want to give

And for once I feel like a well

A fountain

Spluttering forth crystal drops

Of something that restores you.

Makes you whole.

I am only like this with you

You show up the invisible ink in me

The words that others don’t see

You use your fingertips… your tongue

Your lovely mouth whips me into a frenzy

I’m soaring above new clouds

That are fluffier than the last

Is it too fast?

I don’t care.

Because with you, I do.

I dare.

(c) Slumpless

Little pleasure

I don’t have time to plant flowers

Or paint my kitchen blue

I don’t have the patience to bake a cake

I’m too busy to take a bath.

I realised then you absorb colour

From the world. From me.

I gave it out without a thought.

These little pleasures came easy

The smell of coffee in the morning

Candles late at night

These things were scaffolding for my fragile senses

They keep the grey at bay

But for you the world was made of sturdier stuff

And you had no need for sculpted glass.

I’m not saying you’re crass but you’re not as gentle as I thought.

So I will keep filling this world with rainbows

But you won’t find my gold.

(C) Slumpless

Inch

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This thing?

Is not a casual fling.

Not for me.

I’ll make you see. I will make you love me.

I want the bones of you.

The sleepy iridescent pools of blue

The moving tides of your beautiful blood.

The bad. The good,

I want the unfurling, uncurling length and breadth of you.

I will make you love me.

This heat of mine can’t help but yearn.

It will singe the sockets and pockets of your soul.

I’m more than whore. Isn’t everyone?

You already like me a little.

You’ve already given an inch ..inches.

But in a while .. I’ll get the mile.

(c) Slumpless

Death Star

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And when I left

I was pinned to the stars I once looked at

Hooked to the constellations

Swinging from the moon.

I became the swirling universe

But I felt nothing but peace.

Release.

There were no more ‘shoulds’

No more regrets.

I wasn’t missing out, you see?

I am everywhere and everything.

I am in you and with you and always will.

How can I be sad I’m gone ?

I know you are.

You look for me in the star.

The one we named together.

But don’t crane your neck to see me

As I craned mine to see those before.

For I am more.

More than just heavens.

More than hell.

I am all.

And I am well.

(c) Slumpless

Lapse

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Did you notice when it finally quit?

Even just a little bit?

You must have felt a chill?

Slightly ill?

Maybe you were lighter around the shoulders

Springier of step?

Relief perhaps?

When my love for you finally lapsed.

I know I felt lighter but no chill for me.

The heat I emitted was finally free.

To light my soul and eyes again

To stop its searching for an uninhabitable den.

Those months of wasted yearning

Those endless nights of fuel-less burning

Are over now. I will disarm

My love for you

Will no longer keep you warm.

(c) Slumpless

Please Sir, may I have some more?

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Oh you have worn me down.

Pressing the tips of your calloused hands against my heart.

Stop.  Stop. Restart.

I can’t take much more of this.

Just as I think the last drop, the last atom is gone

I’m wrong.

Again.

‘You  have me at hello?’

Well you floored me with it.

And I tried to be casual.

I promise I did.

But this heart of mine still holds your prints

And it’s held up with splints

Which broke.

I’m a joke. A clown.

A lingering fool.

Jelly string on a spool.

I mean nothing to you

And that’s never happened me before.

I have never been cast aside like a whore.

But you stopped me with silence.

But that silence was a roar.

I’m still sore. I’m still sore.

So why do I want more?

(c) Slumpless

 

Beans talk

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Everything I did was for you, because of you

With you in mind.

Because of the possibility you might  be kind.

Might want me again.

And I couldn’t sit still, couldn’t read without your heavy head on my shoulder

And I fought this terrible love

This one-sided thing

While you swayed and danced in the breeze

I was  under heavy soil. Out of sun.

But those tears I shed found their way back in

and cracked my sad shell.

And now I am beanstalk and my head is in the clouds

And you are the old cow sold for magic beans.

(c) Slumpless

Self-flagellation

I’m a lost cause 

The same mistakes over and over

Addicted to the error

Flagellated by the outcome

Just for a taste of sublime wrong

I sing old songs

I get on my own nerves

So I suppose I deserve this

All of this.

And yet maybe I’m making small changes each time

To the words. To the rhyme.

Enough so that I can live with myself.

And maybe all these little changes

Will alter the big picture

And my mistakes will stand up tall and will no longer quiver

And there will come a day when I won’t consider them flaws when I will hit pause and see

That all these things are just part of me

And that the whip I use to beat myself

Is not made of leather but only words

But oh those words can sting

They can cause such harm

Built of old ways and old fears

Ancient rivers sodden with tears.

Tears that no longer run true

But still manage to soak

To turn me into sop.

To muddled mess with dying fish floating at the surface.

I need to set myself free. I need to run to sea.

To disperse into bigger things

To lose my concentration.

Then maybe if I really don’t over think.

I will float instead of …

(C)Slumpless

Citrus Light

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Can I be a warm balmy evening?

Can I be fresh citrus light?

Can I coat you in apple blossoms

Taste your cherry flavored gum

Just for fun?

Can I breathe out desire and soak in stress

Make life seem less…. just less.

Can my soft skin tip yours so that goosebumps hold you close

Can I be the mosquito that sucks your blood

Both annoying and good

Scratch. Scratch me.

Let me in

Under your skin

All over your mouth.

Let me linger on your fingers

Loll on your nose

In quiet repose.

I can be in all of your senses

All of your dreams

Just wish it so. Wish it true.

So I can be all of those things for you.

(c) Slumpless