I dug up a storm for you
And used the trade winds
To buckle your spine.
I syphoned the rains
From all the lands
And poured them down your neck.
I reached into every corner of every crack and abyss that furrows this planet
Just that you may answer me.
Do you care ? Do you?
But all you heard was a whistle. Felt a chill.
My tempest only made me ill.
Just promise me you won’t be cruel
When the time comes to sever these threads
You won’t turn us to shreds.
I look at your face as I lie on your chest
And hope for the best.
But I’ve done this before
And the cut was pure gore, sore.
Please. Please. No more.
So be gentle as you are now
When you lick my leg
Make me beg.
Promise that when you no longer long for this touch
That when I don’t mean much
Just promise you’ll be kind.
And I promise I won’t linger
I won’t be a loser
If I have proper closure.
Originally posted Sept 2017
From now on I will give you a moment.
Only one moment each day.
A pause of equal measure.
Pain and pleasure.
You caused me both.
I will play devil’s advocate to my own heart
Set the balance straight.
I am a Libra after all.
But you have put me out of kilter
With your scorpio sting.
So I will go on living. Give it all I have.
Wake from the dream and the nightmare.
But I promise you a time each day
Because I’m loyal that way.
I think I died
Because I no longer hear your breath when I sleep
Or feel the rough edges of your face in my palm
Nor the smooth sphere of your head against my neck.
I must be dead. I must be.
Because only there I can find an explanation for why your heart doesn’t thud against my skin.
But I’m not in heaven.
I’m caught with just a whisper of you in my ears.
Wondering where I am buried or why you’re so grave.
I’m still unsure.
So I wander. I wander and wait.
Set me free. Set me straight.
Tell me the truth. Please be true.
Did I really die. Or did you ?
It will eat you up
It will swallow you up
Careful now because you will appear the same
But inside you will be gone.
The old you.
The light you. The bright you.
You keep skirting the edges and you will get sucked in.
But this time the worm will be gone
And you will be suspended
I am all or nothing
And you gave me the latter
Like I didn’t matter.
Like I would wait with my tongue hanging loose
Your love a noose
Around this grateful neck.
I don’t do it by halves or quarters
Like a lamb to the slaughter
I go all in.
And there lies the rub
This eagerness you snub
Because you can’t believe it’s true
This love I had for you.
I am all or nothing.
And you gave me none
And it’s no longer fun.
But I’m not laughing now
Nor am I crying
I won’t be dying
For your half arsed look
I close the book.
I said it was forever and I really tried
I’m sorry I lied.
It’s not the Never-ending story
It’s much less glory
It started with a bang
And ends with a sigh
No screaming, no cry
I’ll keep on breathing
And this heart will beat on
For a love that is long gone.
I’m better with just a whisper of you in my life
The feint tinge of your delicious breath on my neck
Any more of your air and I don’t care
About me. About them.
Just a whisper of potential is the carrot to my donkey brain
Stops me going insane.
Too much of you is a gas chamber
A clamber to get out.
The overwhelming sensation of being overcome.
So don’t shout. Don’t talk.
But if you must.
Whisper. Whisper. Whisp…