Please Sir, may I have some more?

nature-2597056_1920

Oh you have worn me down.

Pressing the tips of your calloused hands against my heart.

Stop.  Stop. Restart.

I can’t take much more of this.

Just as I think the last drop, the last atom is gone

I’m wrong.

Again.

‘You  have me at hello?’

Well you floored me with it.

And I tried to be casual.

I promise I did.

But this heart of mine still holds your prints

And it’s held up with splints

Which broke.

I’m a joke. A clown.

A lingering fool.

Jelly string on a spool.

I mean nothing to you

And that’s never happened me before.

I have never been cast aside like a whore.

But you stopped me with silence.

But that silence was a roar.

I’m still sore. I’m still sore.

So why do I want more?

(c) Slumpless

 

Advertisements

Waves

I look for comfort in billowing spume.

Thunderous. Luminous. Vicious.

Circular motion then thundering roar

That’s where my heart can soar.

That body. That body.

That mass. Oh my.

I can barely hear the seagulls cry.

I seek comfort in it’s swishy gurgle

Its undulating moves.

Its undertow , high and low. 

I can ride this beast 

But can never conquer it’s swell.

Oh well.

I’m driftwood . 

Bobbing. Bobbing. Babbling.

Rushing to shore. Rushing to shore.

Then poof….. No more. 

No more me. 

Only soft yellow sands

Formed from a million things that were once tough as rock.

But are now full of footprints.

(C) Slumpless 

Little Hands

michelangelo-71282_1280

I’ll burrow deeper into feather, into soft downy threads

Nestle and settle in a ball in this bed

Escape my head.

Escape you. All of you.

I need time at sea. Time to see.

To dream away this life of grime.

Time… so much time.

This life of traffic, of murk.

Work.Work. Work.

I’ll float in nothing for a while longer

Until I’m stronger

But little hands land on my head

Soft cheeks settle on my pillow

‘Are you ok mum? Are you asleep?’

For little voice I’m drawn out of the deep.

This time.

I hug little hands close to me

Under the cover

For now hibernation is over.

For now. 

(c) Slumpless

Bigger than me

baltic-sea-1367195_1920

I lost her to the sea

To something bigger than me

To a pull that would never leave her standing

To a depth that knows no landing

No end. No end.

This pain. This pain.

I’ve lost her to the waves to the roar

To the shipwreck at their shore

I’ve lost my maiden I’ve lost her well

To that navy blue ominous swell.

(c) Slumpless

Self-flagellation

I’m a lost cause 

The same mistakes over and over

Addicted to the error

Flagellated by the outcome

Just for a taste of sublime wrong

I sing old songs

I get on my own nerves

So I suppose I deserve this

All of this.

And yet maybe I’m making small changes each time

To the words. To the rhyme.

Enough so that I can live with myself.

And maybe all these little changes

Will alter the big picture

And my mistakes will stand up tall and will no longer quiver

And there will come a day when I won’t consider them flaws when I will hit pause and see

That all these things are just part of me

And that the whip I use to beat myself

Is not made of leather but only words

But oh those words can sting

They can cause such harm

Built of old ways and old fears

Ancient rivers sodden with tears.

Tears that no longer run true

But still manage to soak

To turn me into sop.

To muddled mess with dying fish floating at the surface.

I need to set myself free. I need to run to sea.

To disperse into bigger things

To lose my concentration.

Then maybe if I really don’t over think.

I will float instead of …

(C)Slumpless

Black Lips

womens-2359574_1920

My fermenting thoughts, turned you to wine.

Better than grape but not as sweet

Warbling like a stream through my pretty veins

Making me babble like a brook

Black lips, giving you away.

Giving me away.

And though I swirl you about my mouth

I never spit you out.

(c) Slumpless

Soft And Sad 

I will follow you like a whimper

Soft and sad. Slobbering on your shoulder.

You hate the way my nostrils flare 

The way my face puffs when I cry

I’m a useless jelly

A wobbling mass

“Silly Billy.Silly Billy.”

You say it with no hint of light

No glint of love. 

You have nothing else to say.
And I have nowhere else to go.

(C) Slumpless