I Deserve Better

“Absence makes the heart grow fonder”
But for me it’s getting time to ponder
To think back on all little things I tried to ignore
How you wouldn’t even hold the door.

I deserve better.

The perspective I needed is coming true
I can now imagine life without you
If I think about it you were never there
Did you really even care?

I deserve better.

To think I could go so very low
How far down could my standards go ?
I made so many excuses for your strange ways
Wasted so many precious days.

I deserve better.

The worse thing is that I turned mad
Became something that made me sad
Call it crazy you certainly do
While you press my buttons the whole day through.

I deserve better.

Well it worked my sweet, you did the trick
By becoming an unbearable dick.
By making it all about you.

Now I’m getting better.
How about you ?

(C) Slumpless

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Fan Flare

It’s dire this open fire
This unguarded flame
I will always be the same

Open at the hearth

Allowing you to throw rubbish on my light
You fuel me, yes
But eventually I burn out.

Ah but not without a spark here and there.
Not without some flare.

Before There Was Mud.

I saw glitter.
Before there was mud
There was shine.
I saw sparkle and glimmer
Bursting out of your chest
So screw the rest.
What came after.
I’m going to remember the Gold
Not the dust.
I will try to blow it away at least.
Before you were beast
And when I was beauty.
I saw glitter my love.
And I know it’s still there.
You must care.
At least dare to.

No ?

(C) Slumpless

Are you sure ? Am I ?

I vomited words
All over my page. All over you.
If only I could wash them off.
But they just keep coming
This awful bug of mine.
Stop. Stop. Stop me.
I’m trying to write you back.
Write the wrong.
Except I don’t know who is worse.
You or the curse ?
The plague of being in love with love
Let’s be honest it’s me not you.
You could be anyone.
So really I need to stop.
I’m just addicted to convincing
And maybe you know that.
I think you’re the same.
Enough with this game….
Are you sure you don’t want me?

Rust

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Your looks will fade my love

And all the endless preening will come to naught

I was once like you

In other flames, my comfort sought

I let my fire dwindle while I stoked theirs.

And danced like a dervish and whirled through their stares.

Slow it was, the creeping decay

Which turned copper to rust

Grass to hay.

Until one day they looked no more.

And my inner workings were merely gore.

Left uncared for … my brain did rot

And thus it is….my unhappy lot.

So  dance my pretty

I’m not saying no

But keep your inner fire burning

Because your looks will go.

Originally posted May 2017.

(c) Slumpless

A word please

There’s a word but I cannot find it

For the things you do to me.

For the weaving, heaving breaths that you bestow

It’s on the tip of my tongue

Just like you.

A lick, a flick away.

There’s a word that I search for to understand

To make tangible even with only my mouth.

I’m sure if I try to utter it

It will fumble and tumble, rise and fall

Just like you. Just like me.

There’s a word made of a million kisses and slaps to the face

Of cracks to the heart

Then soothing embrace

There’s a word for you and me, for us.

There’s a word. There is.

But I cannot find it.

(C) Slumpless